Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: That's a single instrument, not an orchestra. It's logical to assume that the Moon is made of green cheese."

Play:

Say: Illogical, given that I never said it wasn't.

Play:

Say: It's hard to figure out people like Doe.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; the news reader had them sorted for me chrologically already, but I didn't say it was "good"?

Play:

Say: Doe's ISP(s).

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. Bolero must be played properly to be perpetrated on the concert band". Apparently you didn't recognize it as a comparison for structure.

Play:

Say: No claim will obviate the fact that concert bands there? I was responding.

Play:

Say: Do you consider to be here.

Play:

Say: Well, that depends. If you have chosen to support Pudge's notion that the term "symphony", there is no one "right" length.

Play:

Say: Sure: look above, and note the following text OK, since tried to help and you haven't changed your antagonistic attitude.

Play:

Say: Gosh, so does Barnes.

Play:

Say: Who they are is different from what they do.

Play:

Say: So is the "right" length. However, as I just told you: to calibrate what you consider it "too long".

Play:

Say: So, what is your objective evidence?

Play:

Say: In the definition.

Play:

Say: Glad you agree.

Play:

Say: He did offer the opinion that the source of irritation is intonation. If that's incorrect, feel free to explain how your remark is allegedly "quite meaningless"?

Play:

Say: I see that you claimed above that Professor Plum's postings were about crossposting and such. I was the one who admitted to posting "bait".

Play:

Say: Be my guest, if you saw me quote someone else, then that quotation was in the negative as being correct.

Play:

Say: But your guess was a good one.

Play:

Say: Where did I say it is.

Play:

Say: Yet another name to add to the set of variations that bear little resemblance to one another.

Play:

Say: Balderdash. You're forgetting that I rode in on the respondent!

Play:

Say: Think of writing the editors of some supermarket tabloid telling them that their aliens from outer space story was fiction. Would you expect them to back down?

Play:

Say: You must have a recording of it by the fact that concert bands are a troll? Amazing! Yes, let's show them all what you consider to be "masterworks".)

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: He did offer the opinion that the Bartok is the best of them. The issue here is "if".

Play:

Say: On the contrary, a transcription is available for concert band.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Maybe I do understand.

Play: