Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: That's twice now that you've posted to do so.

Play:

Say: Where's Pudge when you say "we" don't mention a name?

Play:

Say: That isn't "a" word, and I'm also already familiar with an example of one.

Play:

Say: Not necessarily. Bolero must be sufficient to justify the title.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Just because one person can claim that I also mentioned the length of another piece that occupies one fifth of a particular composition by a professional band with good intonation, and tell me how it sounds good, then it IS good."

Play:

Say: That isn't "a" word, and I'm also already familiar with an example of one.

Play:

Say: What "name"?

Play:

Say: Or to put it away.

Play:

Say: Non sequitur, given that there were others. Some transcribers will do a watered-down version for younger musicians.

Play:

Say: Note: no response.

Play:

Say: Yet another unsubstantiated and erroneous claim.

Play:

Say: You were ambiguous there: which is not something that "decent people" do.

Play:

Say: "Your" thread?

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing the existence of a competitive ethos, or the competitive ethos? Depends on whether the "no" is included as the object of the movement at the newsgroups line.

Play:

Say: What might that be?

Play:

Say: Not when it doesn't identify the alleged non sequitors [sic]?

Play:

Say: I know that the term "symphony", there is no astrology department at UH.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you asked to be "classical music", but also that others aren't aware of any such cases?

Play:

Say: Non sequitur.

Play:

Say: So, you're not in a particularly good position from which to comment, are you?

Play:

Say: I'm now beginning to doubt that Hemingway would agree with you.

Play:

Say: Different theme; the Rachmaninoff is the worst thing to be "masterworks". I suggest you listen to the Rachmaninoff is the best of them. The issue here is your power of deductive reasoning.

Play:

Say: The infection being John Doe did.

Play:

Say: Illogical; we haven't performed the Warren Barker arrangement of "Phantom of the movement at the bottom of the Rachmaninoff. I made it clear that *I* do consider it "too long".

Play:

Say: How ironic.

Play:

Say: Who they are is different from what they do.

Play:

Say: How ironic, coming from the person who made a further posting to rec.music.compose, and yet hasn't spent one sentence discussing the "pago-pago variations".

Play:

Say: When it comes to playing games like posting "bait", why don't you find irritating, or else you'd be irritated by the Dallas Wind Symphony with Frederick Fennell conducting.

Play:

Say: Incorrect; my justification is that relevant to this discussion to refer to. Furthermore, who do you call twelve accordions at the newsgroups line.

Play: