Instructions

Alternate sections are marked Say and Play. The Say sections are spoken or sung to an improvised tune in a stentorian and condescending manner, as a traffic court judge lecturing a recidivist speeder. Read as though the text makes perfect sense, even though its grammar and meaning may make sudden, unexpected turns.

The Play sections use an ordinary five-line staff with oval note heads () interspersed with diamond () and cross () note heads. Play in a manner that contrasts with the lecturer's attitude. Be mocking or solicitous or calm or resigned or anything else appropriate.

• I've used bar lines set off groups of notes. Groups should be observed by accent, phrasing, pauses or some other way.
• The cross () indicates some non-standard noise, like a multiphonic or a strum behind the bridge or a dropped drumstick or a cheese-grater arpeggio or something else. Use your imagination.
• The diamond () indicates a note that is one semitone (in either direction) different from the preceding note.
• Rhythm, tempo and dynamics are entirely up to the performer. Since no clef is specified, you can pick that as well.

You can play in concert with other performers, who may play other versions of this piece, or other any other materials, composed or improvised. When playing with others, the Say sections should be performed as disruptively as possible, and the Play sections should be played sensitively, with utmost regard to enhancing the performance of the other players.

Score

Say: I see that you think I posted.

Play:

Say: Repetition of a particular composition by a concert band will not necessarily make it interesting. At least I've given a reason to justify the comparison, whereas you have a problem with what you're talking about.

Play:

Say: Why don't you find "that many" violins to be "classical music", because it's played by a concert band arrangement.

Play:

Say: Irrelevant, given that universities do more than just a little editing.

Play:

Say: You're mixing comparisons, just like Pudge. I said that a piece of music where the strings aren't playing?

Play:

Say: Evidence, please. Where have I inappropriately used "irrelevant"?

Play:

Say: The theme of Niccolo Paganini represents the "same materials" in this particular case, the appearance is courtesy of John Doe, who crossposted to rec.music.compose, including yourself.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you're the one discussing music.

Play:

Say: There's at least some of the piece. Both works are longer than the one who called the Bartok a "masterwork", yet each concerto features a different section.

Play:

Say: I haven't started the script.

Play:

Say: You're erroneously presupposing that the music will be "hypnotically fascinating".

Play:

Say: And throughout the discussion wasn't about linear thinking. That's why it's non sequitur.

Play:

Say: I've seen the CD in record stores here. But for the "Rhapsody" (note that the variations jumping from section to section or soloist to soloist or section to section, just as in the first line above, it looks like it's about Ed Casey's erroneous warning. If you look at the first place. Now, exactly who asked for information?

Play:

Say: Showing your true colors.

Play:

Say: On the contrary, you made a comparison for melody.

Play:

Say: Well, many of the movement at the subject line, it looks like it's about Monty Python. If you look at what you preach.

Play:

Say: The troll in this case is John Doe, who crossposted to rec.music.compose. I didn't answer the question. It figures.

Play:

Say: Undoing the damage you've done nothing to support just one side of the recent transcriptions I've listened to is for "Scheherazade", in which the solo cellist, who was playing with her eyes closed and didn't quite play the last note of the "Best American composer of classical music" thread.

Play:

Say: Well, you can always quit...

Play:

Say: So, what's wrong or bad about one worders?

Play:

Say: Who else are you tossing in another irrelevancy to be "tough going"?

Play:

Say: How convenient.

Play:

Say: Therefore I could not have "pissed" on your part.

Play:

Say: Like John Doe.

Play:

Say: I already proved once.

Play:

Say: That's not the one is isn't a "decent person".

Play:

Say: You were ambiguous there: which is what this newsgroup is appropriate.

Play:

Say: Why do you make that claim?

Play:

Say: That's your problem.

Play:

Say: On what basis do you really expect everyone to simply trust your questionable judgment?

Play: